All semi random thoughts so be prepared. 🙂

So it’s Monday and day three at the new contract job. It’s slow. I have no idea what I’m doing, what kind of work I’m supposed to be doing, so that’s fun. Ughh limbo.

We are THIRTY-THREE days out from the wedding! AHHHHH! I’m stressed. It’s such crazy times, but thank goodness I at least have a job. I wanted to take the whole six weeks off, but that would be lazy, and we desperately need the money.

In other (awesome) news, Peter passed his teacher test! Hopefully he will get hired on at a school, we’re super excited! Middle school math, here we come!

One of the hardest parts about this wedding is Papa not being here. He will have been gone for almost three years by the time the wedding comes up. I remember him being sick, and feeling an (even more) intense need to get engaged, so that he would be here for the wedding. When Peter proposed, I was really happy, and then really sad, because I couldn’t call Papa and tell him. No random sadness has really materialized since then, until I started to think about who would say the blessing at the reception. Naturally it would have been Papa. I had been wrestling with my upsetness about it, and decided that I would call my cousin Jayson and ask him. He doesn’t know it, but I’ve been trying to figure out a way to involve him in the wedding somehow, and this was perfect. I called to ask him, and I started to cry. Saying out loud that Papa wasn’t there to say the blessing made it worse, but Jayson understanding made it better. That’s the thing with family. You all come from the same place with some things, and you don’t always need words to understand. Jayson said he would do it, and I think he is a good Papa substitute. I just feel bad that he had to deal with his unexpectedly emotional cousin on the phone.

Time for bed!