i remember being younger and getting really sick. i don’t know if it was strep or what, but i remember my fever being really high. for some reason i got really scared that i was going to die, and i was afraid my mom wouldn’t be able to hear me if something happened because she kept the door closed at night. and then we read this in womens lit.<\/p>\n

Hanging Fire
\nby Audre Lorde<\/p>\n

I am fourteen
\nand my skin has betrayed me
\nthe boy I cannot live without
\nstill sucks his thumb
\nin secret
\nhow come my knees are
\nalways so ashy
\nwhat if I die
\nbefore morning
\nand momma’s in the bedroom
\nwith the door closed.<\/p>\n

I have to learn how to dance
\nin time for the next party
\nmy room is too small for me
\nsuppose I die before graduation
\nthey will sing sad melodies
\nbut finally
\ntell the truth about me
\nthere is nothing I want to do
\nand too much
\nthat has to be done
\nand momma’s in the bedroom
\nwith the door closed.<\/p>\n

Nobody even stops to think
\nabout my side of it
\nI should have been on Math Team
\nmy marks were better than his
\nwhy do I have to be
\nthe one
\nwearing braces
\nI have nothing to wear tomorrow
\nwill I live long enough to grow up
\nand momma’s in the bedroom
\nwith the door closed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

i remember being younger and getting really sick. i don’t know if it was strep or what, but i remember my fever being really high. for some reason i got really scared that i was going to die, and i was afraid my mom wouldn’t be able to hear me<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[62],"class_list":["post-60","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s1DIlZ-60","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=60"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=60"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=60"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lindsaykeegan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=60"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}