The Great Baby Debate
Pete and I have gone through the "friends getting married" phase. Last year was filled with 9 of our friends' weddings, as well as our own. This year will be the year of the baby. We know a lot of couples who are getting (or trying to get) pregnant.
The thought of having a baby right now completely freaks me out. I love kids. I love watching them learn, and figure things out on their own, and talking and playing. But I'm not ready to care for someone other than Pete and myself right now. We have a few (real and fake) nieces and nephews, and for us, that's enough for the moment.
We decided that when the time comes, we will start with one, and see how things go. But having a baby or not having a baby isn't really the question for us. That all depends on when we feel ready.
The real question for me is: to work or not to work.
My mom stayed at home, so I always thought that I would too. But now I'm not so sure. I love kids, but I hate keeping up with the house. What would I be doing while the kids are at school, aside from playing tennis in the women's tennis league and maybe freelance editing because I feel like it? I don't see Pete and I in a financial position to do that ever, and if we were, I'm not sure that I would want that. We love to travel, want to save up for a good retirement and a cute house downtown. I'm sure that we could do that on one income, but I like what I do. I worked hard to get the job I am in. I don't know if I could give that up.
On top of the fact that Peter will always need healthcare, and one of us will always have to be providing that.
I hate that there is pressure on both sides. You're not a good enough mother if you work, and you're giving up the dreams of the 1950's housewife if you don't.
I will probably end up working when the time comes, and no one is going to make me feel guilty otherwise.