oh time. how you move by so quickly. i heard photograph and it made me all contemplative which is fun and annoying at the same time. i like thinking about some of the past, mostly how much fun i’ve had, and some of it i’d rather forget. and then there’s all this hopefulness about life and how its turning out, like all those questions i had when i was in high school are finally answered. weird how that works out. and then there are all these other questions too.
so lets just say, i can’t believe that i survived this year.
here are some quotes from johhny panic and the bible of dreams by sylvia plath. some are relevant, some are not, but they’re highlighted so i figure i shouldn’t forget them.
-from “america, america!”: somehow it didn’t take — this initiation into the nihil of belonging. maybe i was just too weird to begin with. what did these picked buds of american womanhood do at their sorority meetings? they ate cake; ate cake and catted about the saturday night date. the privilege of being anybody was turning its other face — to the pressure of being everybody; ergo, no one.
-from “the cambridge notes”: but everybody has exactly the same smiling frightened face, with the look that says: ‘i’m important. if you only get to know me, you will see how important i am. look into my eyes . . .” i too want to be important. by being different. and these girls are all the same.
-from “the cambridge notes”: i talk to God but the sky is empty, and orion walks by and doesn’t speak.
– from “the cambridge notes”: and now it gros late, late. and i have the old beginning of the week panic, because i cannot read and think enough to meet my little academic obligations, and i have not written at all . . .
from “the cambridge notes”: tomorrow what? always patching masks, making excuses for having read a half of what i purposed. yet a life is passing!